Held on December 15, 2012
Miyagi Prefecture Father and Son Association
representative Yoshinobu Murakami Mr.
He became a single father in 2003. He is currently engaged in activities to raise awareness about the current state of support for single-father families and to advocate for the correction of inequalities.
To all students studying in Department of Co-existing Society Studies
I hope that through the current situation and challenges faced by single-father families, you have been able to grasp the simple problems inherent in the single-parent support system.
I think you've also come to understand that strengths and weaknesses in work, housework, childcare, and so on aren't determined by gender differences, but rather by "the opportunity to gain experience."
I don't want people to think, "Being a single-father family is tough. We need to support them." Rather, my underlying motivation was to use the perspective of a single-father family to offer some insights into creating a gender-equal society.
As I mentioned at the end of my lecture, the smallest unit of a symbiotic society is your partner (girlfriend/boyfriend) or family. And I believe the key to symbiosis lies in "understanding differences."
The fact that "organizations representing those directly affected changed the law" was positioned not as "begging for support" but as "social proposal activities," and the key points were "ingenuity in communication" and "using words to express oneself."
It's the same whether it's politics, family, or your relationship with the person who laughs beside you.
Please, become a cool man (or woman).
The adults around us tend to try to confine everyone to a box, but we are the ones who decide the society we live in. However, if we keep fighting, coexistence is just a fleeting dream. Start by using words to express yourselves and understanding our differences. Then, each of us, from the unique place we stand right now, find what we can do precisely because of that and let loose!
P.S.: Even though I'm a 33-year-old dad, I still plan on causing some trouble! (lol)
Student impressions
- After listening to this lecture, my challenge going forward has become to consider what true "gender equality" really means. (U)
- In my seminar, I learned that men hold a dominant position in society and that men and women are not equal. While it's true that women's opinions are still not heard in society, I also learned that women aren't the only ones suffering. Honestly, I still don't have an answer to what I can do myself. However, as long as this reality exists and there are people trying to change it, I want to find a job where I can utilize what I learned in Department of Co-existing Society Studies and become someone who can fully support them. (K)
- It seems difficult to take initiative and act to actually change the status quo, like Ms. Murakami did, but I don't think it's irrelevant to us students. We too will one day get married and become parents. When that day comes, I don't think it's okay to have the same old "gender roles" as we do now. As students studying in Department of Co-existing Society Studies, I thought it was important for us to discuss this issue, as well as the questions we have every day. (T)
- I was overwhelmed by the conviction that if fathers' (men's) attitudes change, families, communities, businesses, and society as a whole will change dramatically. I realized that we university students must emulate this style of taking the initiative to make our voices heard and speak out ourselves, rather than leaving it to others, like politicians. (S)
- I believe Ms. Murakami taught us the importance of expressing our opinions to others. When we enter society and encounter many obstacles, I think that trying to communicate our opinions will be the quickest way to find solutions, and ultimately lead to a society of "coexistence" where everyone can help each other. (Ms. O)
- I think there's a situation where we've started to take the support we receive from those around us for granted. Hearing Murakami-san's words, I realized that I'd become so accustomed to being constantly supported that I'd neglected to properly express my feelings in words. Precisely because they're close by, we should face them properly and communicate our feelings in words. I want to keep this firmly in mind as I go about my life. (Y-san)
- To become a parent, the speed at which you give birth or the length of time a woman carries a child in her womb isn't what's important. I was more shocked than moved by the words, "The amount of time you spend with your child determines how quickly you become a parent. Work, housework, and childcare are all important times for developing yourself as a parent." (Ms. A)
- Thanks to activities like Mr. Murakami's, I believe the problems faced by single-father families are being resolved, but this is still only the tip of the iceberg. I think there will eventually be a limit to what can be achieved if only those directly involved make efforts. We must not let what we have learned from Mr. Murakami go to waste and continue our activities. I want to start with what I can do to create a better environment for our own children. (H)
- Before attending the lecture, I had no interest in or knowledge of single-father families. The "common sense" notion that "men work and women do housework" is one of the reasons single-father families suffer. I believe what we can do is "to understand single-father families, we must first understand the current situation." I, too, will strive to deepen my understanding more than ever before. (Ms. M)
- Through this lecture, I realized that my own path in life depends greatly on how I feel and how I act. I had thought that single-father families weren't difficult, but that was completely wrong. Seeing people who are changing the system in Japan made me realize that there is still so much I don't know and so much more I can do. In Department of Co-existing Society Studies, we learn about various issues that are close to us. I want to experience different ways of thinking and living and think about my own future. (I)
- Every time I attend a lecture, it makes me think about what "coexistence" really means. (Y)